Saved by my Guide Dog
In 2014, my entire life was thrown into a state of turmoil when my vision was reduced to a mere 2% overnight. I was 27 years old at the time and felt completely lost.
Although I had always had trouble with my eyes, having lost sight in my right eye at 14 years old, the sudden reduction in the vision in my left eye was unexpected and disorienting. I was an artist working primarily in ink and charcoal, exploring the world through form and movement. Suddenly, I couldn’t engage with creativity in the ways I was once able to. Moving through space without visual information, I felt clumsy and directionless. Social interactions became just as challenging. I hadn’t realised how much I had relied on body language, facial expressions and other subtle cues to navigate conversations. I felt adrift, unable to connect in the way I once had.
Even with these difficulties, I was reluctant to get a Guide Dog. I didn’t know what to expect or how a dog could help in comparison to my trusted white cane. I applied at SA Guide-Dogs Association for the Blind anyway, after the seemingly constant urging of friends and family.
After a year and a half, I received the news that I had been matched with a dog. I met Bonnie for the first time a day before my birthday in July 2018. Bonnie was shy and a little unsure of the new human she’d been partnered with. Like me, she takes time to get used to a new person or situation – one of many traits we share and a testament to the match-making skills of the SA Guide-Dog Instructors!
Despite our slow start, we soon became inseparable. I came to know all her quirks and preferences like leading me to the fridge several times a day in the hopes of getting a carrot or two, her unwavering enthusiasm for new places and her determination to befriend every cat she meets (a sentiment that has yet to be reciprocated).
In those first few months, for the first time in a long time, I was distracted from all the worry and self-focus and, through Bonnie, I was able to let go of something I didn’t know I was holding onto. She drew my attention outward, reminding me that the world is not filled with things to be feared but an adventure to be had. When I felt distant and estranged from other people and myself, I could reach down and feel her warm fur and be reminded of the proximity of things. As many dog owners will tell you, you’re never truly alone when you have a dog.
Bonnie not only changed the way I moved through the world but also the way I experienced social interactions. I became more relaxed; less anxious. People treated me differently than before – more like a subject than an object.
Before Bonnie, I had often felt both invisible and highly exposed at the same time, but with her by my side, interactions were much warmer. Instead of awkward avoidance or stares, I was met with curiosity, kindness and even joy. I am often met with the high-pitched exuberance of children caught up in the novelty of seeing a dog in a mall, spontaneous conversations with ‘dog people’ (the best sort of people, Bonnie assures me) and – my favourite – connections with puppy trainers. I was able to begin to re-orientate myself in many of the areas where I’d felt lost. With Bonnie’s help, I even managed to complete a Master’s Degree in Fine Arts and, most recently, an Honours degree in Psychology at the University of the Witwatersrand.
I often think about all the people and resources involved in training dogs like Bonnie and wonder what life would be like if this service weren’t available or if I had never applied for a Guide Dog. I can’t say for sure how things would be different, but I distinctly remember the feeling a few months after I met Bonnie that she had she saved my life. She helped me feel more human, more connected and gave me a renewed sense of belonging. I will forever be grateful to share my life with Bonnie.
If you would like to apply for a Guide Dog like Bonnie, please contact us at info@guidedog.org.za or on 011 705 3512 (Johannesburg) / 021 674 7395 (Cape Town) or visit our website.
Written by Alexandra Makhlouf